Jill wants to know: Is there any generic thing that needs to happen in order for Saoirse to actually overcome her need for revenge? For example an apparition of her dead brother? Although that would be hard to work in. But something of the sort? I'm running in circles trying to have Saoirse let go of her revenge, but nothing seems to be working.
She's indignant, of course, and this indignation is like a fuel she's running on. It makes her feel solid and powerful, rather than frail or weak. When she has what therapist call "revenge fantasies" about hurting people from the race who killed her brother, she's reinforcing herself to have these fantasies because staying strong and powerful prevents her from being overwhelmed by what underlies her fantasies, which is the sadness, helplessness, and even hopelessness. There is a great journal article on more of this here. (Warning: it's full of psychologese, but if you can wade through it, it's really good.)
Thinking outside the therapeutic box for a second (b/c make no mistake, your girl would benefit from some intense 1:1 time!), perhaps if you have her as the target of someone else's misguided revenge, that might make a dent for her. If you had a parallel story line running alongside hers...it might do the trick. Or if her revenge puts Ioan in danger, that might also be a reality check.
Here are two quotes I like about revenge:
- “Resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies.” ~ St. Augustine
- “There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.” ~ Josh Billings (1818 - 1885)
Anyway, best of luck with this book!
Let's Analyze: Have you ever been eaten away with resentment? Can you relate with Augustine's quote about taking poison and hoping the other person dies? How did you overcome it?